Wednesday 14 March 2012

The Continuing Amish Crime Wave

Driving through peaceful Amish country may seem like a safe endeavor but I’m telling you folks that you are risking more than you would ever guess by doing so. There is a growing Amish crime wave.
This past week four youths of that bent were arrested for underage drinking after an alert New York police officer discovered their drunken horse and buggy drag race on a public highway where they were using both lanes. One of the buggies tried to change lanes and struck the police cruiser, resulting in the buggy flipping and the horse breaking loose to rampage through the countryside.
Only the latest outrage, this comes after a 2011 hate crime spree in Ohio. That’s two events in two years. In that activity seven Ohio members of a breakaway sect cut off beards of their opposition. Once they knocked on the door and pulled out the bearded gentleman, then attacked his facial hair with a pair of scissors. Earlier they had broken into a house and cut facial hair from all of the residents, one of who was 74 years old.. For good measure they removed the hair from a thirteen year old lass.
Some of the cult members were caught with freshly shorn locks they brought home to prove to their leaders that they had carried out their assignment.
The leader of this sect, with the surname of Mullet, which brings to light other possible hair related crime, was noted for his strictness. He was known to have forced members to spend several days in a chicken coop. That, coupled with the horse thing, makes one wonder if PETA is not slacking off on the job a little.
If that were all of the police blotter material there might not be much of a case for calling this a crime wave. Wait though; there is more.
As recently as 2008 Kentucky Amish blatantly ignored a law requiring them to display and orange safety triangle on their buggies when driving on public highways. The miscreants produced at least two weak excuses for this blatant disregard of public safety.
One of them was willing to apply a long strip of orange tape across the back of his buggy but refused to display the triangle saying that was a symbol reserved for the holy trinity. Another cited the use of the triangle as a symbol indicating the lack of trust in the Lord to provide all of the protection they needed.
Part of the punishment for refusal to pay fines for failing to abide by the law appears to have been forcing them to wear ORANGE prison garb. A little jail time was meted out as well.
In still another matter of public safety the Rainbow Acres Farm in Pennsylvania was shut down after a FDA sting operation proved there was raw milk being sold across interstate lines. A federal agent used several aliases to sign up for a Yahoo group of users who ordered milk from Pennsylvania for delivery in Maryland. He ordered milk for delivery to a private residence in Maryland and pounced upon the delivery when it was made.
In an unsubstantiated off-the-record statement the agent said “I knew we were onto to something big when I saw all those guys in black suits milking cows. It’s not like we didn’t learn anything when we were dealing with the mafia.”
The agency also managed a five AM surprise inspection of the Rainbow Acres Farm. While it may have been the crack of dawn for the inspectors the criminals were wrapping up their daily operation. Fortunately, before leaving, one if the inspectors saw milk being tagged for delivery to Maryland.
The cagey criminal switched his business model to a stock operation (not sure if the pun is intended or not) by selling shares of his dairy herd and delivering the dividends to stock holders.
A heads-up judge recognized the deception and delivered a 14 page decision against the farmer. His brilliance was somewhat challenged by a protest group who rallied in Constitution Park opposite the national capitol and publicly drank raw milk.
There you have it. Amishish criminal activity in four states in four years. This is getting out of hand. Folks, we don’t need to make heroes out of these kinds of law breakers. We need to stop this before it becomes a 21st century abomination.

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